A Rose with Starry Eyes

{February 15, 2010}   I’m on the verge of CRACKING

I am RAVENOUS. I didn’t take my adderall since I was feeling the aftereffects of yesterday’s dosage and thought I could handle it. After a glass and a third of orange juice and not nearly enough water for a water fast, I don’t think I can. I chew-spat a pancake with whipped cream, and went to the grocery store and bought a can of tuna and a shoplifted lemon-pepper seasoning since it was small and even MORE expensive that the friggin’ tuna. Didn’t eat it, though. I have been SO CLOSE TO CRACKING all day long. It’s not fair. Why can’t I have a fast metabolism?!

(According to my brother, chewing and spitting is worse tan eating because it’s soclose and you can’t have any.) And he just pointed out that, even though I am SO CLOSE TO CRACKING, “But you didn’t.” Which really does help.

I’m gonna go to bed now to make the cravings stop. (i also had a nap earlier too, so… Lazy.)

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