A Rose with Starry Eyes

{March 16, 2010}   guest star post: tips

Guest star Gaunt Future tells about the OCD with food that helps her restrict, & recommends a 13 calories beverage that keeps you full all day long…

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


my new two staples:


WHY are these my new staples, you ask?
both are infused with citrimax, for one.

citrimax is a supplement that keeps your appetite curbed and boosts energy and stamina. and let me tell you that it WORKS. i haven’t been hungry all day and I had 20 fl. oz. of the lifewater.

Fuze, of course (sadly) has about 13 calories per bottle (18.5 oz), so you need to be careful with it. But that has even more metabolism-boosting power than the lifewater – it’s also spiked with L-Carnitine, which blasts cellulite off those flabby thighs. drink one in the morning for a 13 calorie breakfast and stay full for hours.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

here’s my day (o-c tendencies way exploited)

wake up at 11:00. Look in mirror naked, pinch fat for about 5 minutes. wash face and get dressed – it’s FREEZING. go into the kitchen and eat an apple and a slice of toast with light cream cheese on it – about 210 calories.

run around and dust house in frantic frenzy – it’s extremely dirty here right now. yell at dad and tell him to stop bothering me, get car ALMOST taken away.

it’s 2:00. go eat an orange and slowly dissect it before consuming, sucking all the juice out of the pulp before eating the pulp. 80 more calories. grand total of 290 calories for breakfast and lunch.

go to Alice in Wonderland for the second time (since Friday) at 3:30. Buy a regular Diet Coke (about 25 oz) and fill it twice. drink ALL OF IT (yummy caffeine…who cares if it’s bad for me?!) and let it work wonders on my metabolism-slash-brain. Get sent to Famous Dave’, a disgusting bar-b-que restaurant that makes me want to tear my hair out (one corn bread muffin is about 600 calories…does that not tell you something about the place??) and order a chargrilled chicken sandwich, plain, just a bun and chicken.

take top of bun and set it aside – eliminate 150 calories. take knife and cut bottom bun and chicken up into tiny pieces, and do so for about 5 minutes. I’ve consumed my first bite. chew 50 times and swallow. repeat. I take a grand total of 30 minutes to finish the chicken breast and a third of the bun. By then, everyone else is done and I’m able to say I’m full. Total calories consumed: 300.

So today was a 600 calorie day. I’m feeling way bloated and nauseous because of it, but who cares? tomorrow I’ll feel great because of it.

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